LFG Smash
Real Fruit, Lightly Carbonated
Now available in New Hampshire (legally!)
Distributed in the Northeast by Stogies & Spirits Distribution
We are currently working on the new LFG Smash Merch, but there's still plenty of the Seltzer that Fucks Merch available using the Shop Now button below.
Everything from Shirts to Hoodies to Sex Pants to Hats and a lot of other things. Yes, I tried to slip in the sex pants, speaking of that...
apparently our lawyers made me take out the rest of this, maybe you can get the full story somewhere on the LFG Tiktok page.
What about facebook/instagram/snapchat? We are waiting for our bans to end.
Brewed with Real Fruit
Savor the authentic flavor of real fruit in every sip of our smashes. No artificial ingredients, just pure goodness.
Seriously, take the name brand that our lawyers won't let me say (but if I said Low Midnight or Black Fang, you would get it) seltzer you are drinking and pour some out for the homies. It's clear as day, where is the flavor? Now pour some of ours out, in a cup (you don't want to waste perfection) and you will see the colors of the fruits it's made with, and even better, you will taste it. It's more of a juice than a seltzer, unless your the alcoholic taxing bureau, then it's a seltzer, definitely not a specialty beverage.
Lightly Carbonated Perfection
Our beverages are lightly carbonated to enhance the flavor experience without overwhelming your taste buds and forcing you to burp after every sip like all the other seltzers. If we could get away without any carbonation we would, but that leaves us with either injecting liquid nitrogen into the can, which doesn't sound great, or having a squishy can, also not great. So the solution is a lightly carbonated, easily crushable, great tasting, ok ok, you get it, beverage.
5% Fruit Smash Magic
With an intoxicating 5% alcohol content (see what I did there?), our Smashes offer the perfect balance of flavor and kick for a truly sensational drinking experience. As you can see, they are less alcoholic than my dad, I mean, they contain less alcohol than the original 8% seltzers, but they go down a lot smoother. But if you are looking for that 8%, there is a link below that will take you into the darkness.
About LFG Smash
Real Fruit, Real Refreshment
At LFG Smash, we're all about bringing you the ultimate experience. Our beverages are made with real fruit, lightly carbonated for that perfect kick. It's the best 5% fruit smash you'll ever taste. Get ready to indulge in seltzer that truly kicks ass.
Come join the Smash revolution with LFG!
I'm gonna come clean here, AI wrote this section. I was going to just take it out, but it makes some good points.
Our Flavors
Below are the current SMASH and BEER flavors that are available. Flavors such as Margaritavilletown, The Beach Peach Boys, and Tropical Thunder Lightning. Note, we may have had to change some names due to legal reasons, but like, you still get it. We didn't even try with naming the suspiciously pink lemonade what we are all thinking it should be named, and by the time we got to the beer we just gave up on the whole thing, so it's literally just beer.
If you came here looking for last years seltzers, first off, good on you. It takes a strong soul to attempt an 8% seltzer that's only goal is to make you try and figure out what happened the night before. And yes, you can still find them at the original site www.lfgseltzer.com
Margaritatown
Lemon and Lime
Our lawyers desperately wanted us to change this name, but there's no way one entity can own all Margarita named geographic locations. I mean, come on
The Peach Boys
Peach and Mango
You guessed it, this is a peach flavored smash, but it also has a nice hint of mango that really gives it those beach vibes, and yes, we know we're probably infringing on some stuff with the flavor name here, but like, can we all just be chill about that?
Suspiciously Pink Lemonade
Strawberry and Lemon
We love pink lemonade, but like, is it a little suspiciously pink to you? Like, this is a work place and someone is gonna lovingly pump this lemonade full of sweet, sweet strawberry like that? Shameful.
Tropical Lightning
Pineapple and Tangerine
This Smash has a refreshing tropical and pineapple flavor, but also, is not associated with any movie, past or present. Listen, we like the name of this flavor and we don't feel like one film (and a great one at that) from 20 years ago should stop us from using it.
It's Just Beer
American Lager
This isn't some sloopy doop double IPA or a pineapple infused sour aged 10 years in a van down by the river.
This is a beer.
Open it, give it a nice refreshing sip, and you'll totally be like, "Yep, that's definitely a beer." Feet to the fire, it's technically an American Lager, which like, how cool is that? Definitely the most patriotic of the lagers.
Click on the locations on the map to see details of where to purchase LFG Smash
Get in touch
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